Tiny Notes on the back of my camera
On Being a beginner again, even when you thought you’d figured things out
In the beginning, I taped tiny notes to the back of my camera.
Photography had always been a hobby…until it wasn’t. Until, thanks to the early days of Flickr and Instagram, people began noticing my work. Before I knew it, I was being paid to take photographs. Which was both thrilling and terrifying.
Before each photo shoot, I’d follow the same routine. I’d read over my notes about lighting. I'd study my Pinterest boards to remind myself how best to pose people. And driving to the shoot, I'd listen to the same calming songs that I could sing along to, trying to keep my nerves at bay.
Once I arrived, I would put on my best “smiles-everyone” face and confidently direct the photo shoot despite a thousand reminders going off inside my head.
And always, I would have tiny notes taped to the back of my camera.
Honestly, now, I can’t even remember what they said. Aperture, probably. ISO. Shutter speed. The exposure triangle every photographer must wrestle with.
But somewhere along the way, after pressing that shutter button thousands of times, I took down the tiny notes. I no longer needed to memorize Pinterest boards or sing along to calming songs on my way to a shoot. What once felt overwhelming and stressful had become second nature.
When I look back at those early photographs, I can see my mistakes. I overexposed more than a few images. I clearly believed every person looked better backlit, and if there was a sun flare…even better. But despite all that, I’m proud of the work. And more importantly, I’m grateful that I showed up and took those photographs, tiny notes and all.
And now, after all these years of feeling comfortable behind a camera, I’ve decided to learn videography.
Suddenly, I’m back to watching YouTube tutorials on repeat, trying to remember how to balance audio levels, record a voiceover, and export a finished video. There are so many moving parts, and half the time I can’t remember which setting does what.
So, I’m back to having tiny notes taped everywhere.
This week, I posted my first video in what I hope will become my Field Trip series. It’s a little rough around the edges, and I go a bit long in the beginning. But when I watched that one-minute story come together, with all its moving parts, I felt something I hadn’t felt in a while.
The thrill of having made something I’d never made before.
I recently came across a quote on Instagram by @giseleazad that read, “What a blessing to be embarrassed by your earlier work, because you were brave enough to start.”
I love that. Although when I look back at those early photographs, embarrassment isn’t exactly what I feel. Mostly, I’m grateful I was brave enough to begin, even when I had no idea what I was doing.
Because we don’t have to be good at something to begin. We can show up with our notes, our nerves, and our imperfect first attempts. And if we keep going, perhaps someday we’ll look back and be so proud of how far we’ve come.
I hope I never stop doing this. I hope I always have something new I’m learning. Something that requires a few tiny notes taped here and there.
Is there something new you’ve been wanting to start? Maybe this is the week you tape a tiny note to it.
Cheers,
Carrie
PS: If you’d like to watch my first attempt at storytelling through video, you can watch Field Trip No. 1 on Instagram or YouTube. It’s rough…but it’s a start!
The more life I live, the more I understand how precious our time is. What even a few minutes is worth. It doesn't go unnoticed that you spend some of your day here with me. Thank you for letting me be a small part of it. I hope you always leave with something meaningful.🤍